Yuck. After looking at something so frequently for so long long, over six years in this case, it begins to lose its identity and it just becomes the manifestation of memories. Much like when you say the same word over and over again fifty times in a row, its meaning begins to slip from your consciousness. Go ahead, try it with something really visceral, like “vomit.” You’ll think, “There’s now way the meaning of that word will disappear,” but after twenty or thirty times you’ll lose the image in your mind and you’ll only hear yourself creating strange consonants and vowels, but you won’t really remember why. This bottle of Rhinocort–nasal spray for any non-nerd readers–is my vomit. Wait, that came out wrong. This is nasal spray that I used during allergy season, but judging by the expiration date I haven’t needed it since 2006, and since then it’s just been kickin’ it in my junk drawer. I say it’s my vomit because it’s one of those trinkets that I see so often whenever I open the drawer that I forgot how disgusting it is to have six-year-old nasal spray in my drawer.

Whenever I swipe it out of the way to grab a pen, it’s not gross nasal spray to me; it’s my eyes, swollen shut from the blooming grass pollen in the springtime, and my dad, snorting his own spray before bed to help his mammoth snore. It’s my mom, worried that my allergies would block my breathing and I’d die in my sleep, or my brother, never laughing at me when I had to use it. This is why I keep stuff like this, for the instant flood of nostalgia, but this is also why I’m keeping this blog: the nostalgia is quickly forgotten if I can’t communicate it, so sitting down and plunking it out on here is what really creates a lasting impact. The downside is that in order to communicate what it means to me, I have to first admit what it is, and sometimes it’s pretty gross. Like tonight; I’m handling old, used, expired nasal spray. Oh, the trinkets I keep.



~ by russell jander on January 26, 2012.

4 Responses to “Rhinocort”

  1. So well written…

  2. Felt that way cleaning out the medicine cabinet yesterday…but I think I have you beat. We had stuff that expired in 2003! Your blog is fascinating, Russell. It inspires me when I hit a pocket of nostalgia. 🙂

  3. Reminded me that I need to clean out a few drawers in my house. Get rid of my “vomit”.

  4. I knew there had to be others out there who keep trinkets as a way of remembering. My sister is moving and found a couple of my boxes in her suite (we used to be roomies) … I’ll be going through them tomorrow and I can’t wait to find my old memories! My forgotten laughs and loves and even heartbreaks (I might have to throw away those now, though).
    I really like your idea; I like that you aren’t making yourself purge, but that you re-visit and remember each “thing” and document it for yourself, then say goodbye. Coolness.
    I’m with a man who hates trinkets and doesn’t understand keepsakes, and that’s super hard. We’re doing a clean-out of our storage unit tomorrow – I could spend DAYS going through my stuff, but I don’t have that kind of time *so nervous*
    Thanks for helping me find you 😉

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